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Day 15: Feel The Fear And Embrace It Or Tell It Where To Go

Agoraphobe Meets Mountain
Creative Commons License Photo Credit: Spencer Finnley via Compfight

In this 30-days to Mastering Your Fears Series, The Skool of Life and The Fear Project are collaborating to blow the doors off our most primal emotion. Today my substitute teacher is Natalie Sisson

What are you really afraid of?

Is it fear itself, the fear of failure, or the fear of success.

Fear in its simplest form is just feedback that you’re stepping into the unknown.

This is exciting right? This sparks your curiosity. This heightens all your senses. This makes you feel alive – and personally I’d love that feeling every day.

Fear is also darkness. As you walk towards this darkness you’re actually bringing lightness with you, and illuminating that wonderful path ahead of you.

You’re lighting the path to cross into this unknown. On the other side you’ll see it really wasn’t that bad after all, in fact it’s likely a heck of a lot better, than had you stayed paralyzed in your own fearful thoughts and stayed where you were.

And this is a great thing, because as you face your fears more often, it means you’re doing more of things in life that are truly worthwhile, potentially life changing and nothing short of invaluable.

How do you know this? Because nothing worth doing well is ever going to be easy. If you’re planning on making a difference in this world, it’s not going to be a piece of cake, is it?

You need to be the courageous person who believes in themselves and what’s at stake, and carries on despite their fears.

If you’re feeling fearful here are some instant remedies:

1. Take a deep breath

Reconnect with your body. You’re probably so far in your own head, using your intuition and your intellect that you’ve got disconnected from your body. So to stop being all wrapped up in your own thoughts, just take some really deep breaths, and you’ll find the fear will dissipate.

2. Name your fear.

Make it real. When it becomes real you can start to pull it apart and figure out what it really means. By breaking it down you see it for what it is, and that means it’s not as overwhelming or worrisome as you thought. I like sit down to lunch with my fear actually. I like to give fear a face, a persona, and make it human. In doing so it becomes way less scary and I can even tell it where to go!

3. Lose the ego.

Check it at the door. Quite often fear is you thinking you’re going to lose face if you don’t achieve your goal, or that you’ll freeze when speaking on stage and look like an idiot, or that the book you just wrote is a piece of crap. Take our ego out of it and instead focus on your intention. Your intention is to serve others, to make an impact, to leave a legacy right? When you focus on that it becomes about the bigger picture and vision, not just you.

When I think about it, my entire life has been determined by being confronted by fear and either running far from it or, far more commonly facing it head on.

Most people think I’m crazy to be a homeless vagabond, to have no real possessions, to travel by myself and to head off to strange new countries, leaving all that I’ve come to know behind.

In some ways it is kind of crazy, it can also be scary, but it definitely keeps me alive and grateful of all the opportunities for adventure that lay before me.

It tests me daily. I have to learn to judge my intuition, make quick decisions and trust in complete strangers. All of this is scary, but also exciting, and part of life’s rich tapestry.

The more I encounter it, the less scary it becomes.

You can choose to settle down at anytime, but I choose not to settle. This is our only life. We owe it to ourselves to make the most of it.

There’s no way fear should ever stand in our way of doing what we’re born to do. So next time you feel fear try this on for size, and say it out loud:

“This is my life, my decision, and my choice to make the most of each and every moment. Not yours Fear. So either join me on this journey or get out of my way!”’

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